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Joke of the Day

"HER: I think we should see other people. ME: I don't. We're awful. We should leave other people alone."

"How many ears does Daniel Boone have? He's got a right ear, a left ear, and a frontier."

"Guys who go see 50 Shades of Grey... Do you all remain seated an extra 30 min after the movie's done? "

"""This is a robbery! Be cool and nobody gets hurt!"" ME: *starts vaping*"

"Did you hear about the race between the two decapitated heads? I heard they were neck and neck"

"This is a joke translated from japaneese ... Two men walk into a pub. Clunk Clunk"

"You know what's funny about Internet Explorer? Punch line buffering..."

"40-32/2=4! (-1)12 <3 Maths"

"Once upon a time, I used to worry that people would think I'm weird. These days I'm genuinely surprised when they don't. "

"As he inserted the rectal thermometer, I got a painfully hard and obvious erection... ""Maybe you should wait outside whilst I examine your dog,"" said the vet."