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Joke of the Day

"When you're on a date that's not going well, just start talking about genital psoriasis. You're welcome."

"They say history is written by the winners... But actually, history is written by historians and most of them are losers."

"What kind of donuts did Bob Marley prefer? The ones with Jam in"

"I'm not saying she's a slut but she's had more people inside her than the statue of liberty!"

"Toddler tech support: ""Did you try throwing it and crying?"""

"What's the difference between a magicians wand and a police baton? The magician's wand is used for cunning stunts"

"After writing Revelations, John ask God... ""Lord, the end will be signaled by trumpets?"" ""*No, by Trump/Pence.*"" ""Right, so trumpets."" ""*Fuck it, they'll figure it out.*"""

"What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? One requires tweetment and the other needs oinkment"

"I've always stood up for black people. It's not worth getting stabbed over a seat."

"If Ben Affleck played Daredevil and Batman does that mean that he's blind as a bat? #WellThatsAGoodQuestion"