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Joke of the Day

"Why do the French make omelettes with only one egg? Because in France one egg is un oeuf."

"What do I say when my favorite spice knocks on the door? Cumin!"

"Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar... And the bartender goes ""why the long face"""

"*phone rings* Wife: Quick! Pretend I'm not in!"" Me: *dresses baby up in Superman costume & duct tapes him to ceiling fan* Wife - ""...."""""

"*a man runs into the bar* ""HELP HELP, IS ANYONE HERE COUSINS WITH BON JOVI?"" *my date looks at me, I do nothing, my lies are now exposed*"

"The Mafia have decided to update it's operations to keep up with internet trading. Their first venture is called Pay-Up-Pal"

"A developer tried to pull weeds out of his garden... But he didn't have root access."

"My girlfriend complained about my premature ejaculation So I told her ""A wizard never cums late nor early. He cums precisely when he means to"""

"What do you call a guy with no arms or legs on a wall Art What do you call arms and legs on a wall Pieces of art"

"A cheetah and a lion are racing in Africa After the cheetah easily wins, the lion complains: ""Man, you're a cheetah"" and the cheetah says: ""Naw man you're a lion""."