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Joke of the Day
"What's the square root of 69? ate something"
Next Joke
"A new zoo opened up in my town, but it only has one dog. It's a shih tzu"
"For five years my mother tucked me in at night... she really wanted a girl Credit goes to my friend Nick for telling me this one. Hi Nick!"
"If your name is Susan, I surmise you're lazy. If your name is Tom, I posit you're a peeper. If your name is Jason, I automatically assume... YOU'RE A CUNT!!! NO! SERIOUSLY, FUCK YOU, JASON!!!"
"Used way too much moisturizer and I may have to call in slick tomorrow."
"I just saw a girl hang half her body out the window of her car to give someone the finger. She is my spirit animal."
"Alpha Kenny Body Say it fast, slut."
"Q: What do you call two spiders who just got married? A: Newlywebs."
"Got asked to be godfather of my niece, so if anything happens to her parents then someone else has to take care of her because I said no"
"Did you hear the one about the three deep holes in the ground? Well, well, well..."