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Joke of the Day

"I Asked 100 Women Which Shampoo They Preferred? The Top Answers Was: Get The Hell Out Of My Bathroom!"

"""Stop anthropomorphising me, bitch""- my cat, while i'm writing this."

"I hear seatbelts save lives! Nope, nevermind, still have cancer."

"How do you make Obama's eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in his ear."

"The GOP candidates are competing to win over Scott Walker supporters after he pulled out of the race... But all three of them remain undecided still."

"Like ""dollar,"" ""euro"" is not capitalized. Unlike a dollar, a euro can actually buy you something."

"Subway should be taken to court. They force their male employees to make sandwiches for other people and that is clearly sexist."

"What happens when U change position too fast? You get an unpleasant vowel movement."

"What do Hispanic midgets cut their pizza with? Little Caesar's"

"Our children are our future. Unless they invent a method for time travel, then they're also our past."