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Joke of the Day

"This lady in Walgreens is staring at me like she's never seen anyone put on deodorant and then put it back on the shelf."

"Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant."

"Sir, on a scale of 1 to drunk, where would you say you stand? I'll sit"

"Yo mama so fat she has more chins than a chinese phone book"

"Q: What is a volcano? A: A mountain with the hiccups."

"What's black and runny Moses Kiptanui"

"What do ghosts do when they're sad? They get in an elevator to lift their spirits."

"Say what you will about ISIS... But you can't deny their suicide business is booming."

"My buddy told me he wanted to study paleontology... I told him it was a dead-ends job."

"My autocorrect just changed ""I'm off"" to ""I'm DTF"" and changed a casual conversation with my boss into an H.R meeting."