16149

Joke of the Day

"A girl called me up, she said ""come over there's nobody home"" So I went over, but there was nobody home"

Next Joke
 
"As an atheist I don't receive many xmas cards and the ones I do disproportionately say ""may God have mercy on your soul."""
"*stares into the abyss* *abyss pretends it's doing something on its phone*"
"How did the unqualified harp player get into the orchestra? She pulled some strings."
"No offense, but I'd only circle half the globe to be with you."
"What's a zombie's favorite snack? Fritos"
"I noticed my wife was reading a book that was titled ""The Silent Wife"". I immediately asked ""That's fiction, right?"""
"I just took a huge shit. I don't know who it belongs to, but I took it."
"Why are fish so thin? Because they eat fish!"
"One of my oldest friends is my receding hairline... We go way back."