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Joke of the Day
"How does Lady Gaga like her meat? raw raw raw raw raw"
Next Joke
"What does expensive pasta cost? A pretty penne"
"Taco Bell doesn't have a playground, because kids that eat Taco Bell can't climb, or run."
"There was a praying mantis in my room so I stealthily grabbed a shoe and smashed my 2nd-story window and jumped out."
"If I'm ever in an accident while driving and tweeting and you're the first person to arrive on the scene, grab my phone and press ""Send."""
"Just once I'd like the guy hired to kill me to complete the job and not fall in love with me."
"HR: How do you think we can better handle this in the future? ME [glaring at Cheryl, who took the last donut]: idk, maybe don't hire Cheryl"
"My wife never catches me scoping out the hot chick because she's too busy judging the hot chick."
"two gay blokes are preparing to go away on a holiday... one says to the other, ""want me to pack your shit?"""
"""Can we talk tomorrow?"" is my way of saying ""I'll try to do a better job of avoiding you tomorrow?"""