160662

Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey? Darth Mule! A joke, from third grade me... Happy Star Wars day!"

"Why doesn't Skrillex like to go fishing? Because he always drops the bass."

"How many hobos does it take to screw in a light bulb? They don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dumpsters"

"I like to cover my tracks by ending all my Google searches with the word ""hypothetically"""

"""Finish your peas. Kids in China are starving"" ""Finish your math. Kids in America are cheating off the Asian kids"""

"""Hey Ernie do you want some ice cream?"" ""Sherbet."""

"Two peanuts walk into an elevator One was Ray Rice and the other was assaulted."

"Is everything expensive or I'm just poor?"

"My doctor won't go away. I know what you're thinking but he has been eating small pieces of apple over many decades to build up an immunity."

"I assert dominance over millennials by responding to their texts with phone calls."