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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and Hitler? Hitler had a plan."

"A neutron walks into a bar... and inquires how much a drink costs. The bartender replies, ""For you? No charge."""

"People say I'm disagreeable They're all wrong"

"Whats a pirate's favorite letter? ""You'd think it would be R but its actually the c!"" Aye matey"

"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."

"(During sex) Pull my hair! No! Just the grey ones."

"A man tells his friend his wife broke up with him and has full custody of his kids... His friend says: ""I feel so sorry"" The man says: ""I feel worse for the kids"""

"How do you know when a cat's done cleaning itself? It's smoking a cigarette."

"I'd love to date one of our moderators. Every joke is long to them."

"What is a blonde's favorite color? Glitter."