159470

Joke of the Day

"A joke the owner of the pizzeria I work at told me while listening to Beethoven. Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? Because it wouldn't stop saying ""Bach, Bach, Bach."""

"An apple a day keep the doctor away But only if it's thrown hard enough"

"Why are Suicide Bombers always angry ? Because of their Short Fuses."

"I'd like to share a joke with you that my 2yo nephew told me. 2yo: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? 2yo: I don't know. *leaves"

"What do you call an international criminal waffle that you dropped at the beach? Carmen Sandy Eggo"

"Did you hear about the chickpea freedom fighters? They call themselves Hummas."

"X: I hate when the cat just stands like that, frozen. Why does he do that? Me: He's on paws. X: ... Me: On... paws. X: I hate you so much."

"What's blue and yellow and sits at the bottom of the pool? A baby with slashed floaties. What's red and yellow and floats on top of the pool? Floaties with a slashed baby."

"In a world full of lefts Nothing would be right."

"In my opinion, the most important part of any meal is the ingredients"