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Joke of the Day

"the latest trend I hear the latest trend is to install trampolines on cruise ships - apparently everyone's jumping on board"

"You need subtitles. Me to every 2yr old."

"Jumping Off A Building Two men, one black and one white, jump off a building, which one arrives first on the floor? A: The white one. The black man was busy stealing the air conditioners."

"I need to start paying closer attention to stuff. Found out today my wife and I have separate names for the cat."

"I wrote ""Clarence sale"" instead of ""clearance sale"" and now there are angry old ladies here looking for a husband."

"I can't make it tonight. There's a couple fighting at Target and the guy just started sarcastically clapping. I need to see where this goes."

"What do you call a shifty midget in a police line up? A little suspect"

"The actress that played Anne Frank in the Anne |Frank story was so bad..... That the scene where the Nazis entered the stage and said ""where is she"" the audience shouted ""she's in the attic""."

"LION: Lions don't lose sleep over the opinion of sheep. SHEEP: Shaun thinks your mane looks ridiculous. LION: *upset* Shaun said that?"

"A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, Doc, I'm horribly sick! The doctor looks at her and asks, flu? No, I drove here."