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Joke of the Day

"""It's the little things in life that make you laugh,"" my mom used to say. I never understood it until I saw two midgets fighting at Walmart."

"Why do milking stools only have 3 legs? Because the cow has the udder"

"What do you call it when you think deeply about something you just saw on reddit? Redditation. I am so sorry... that was horrible."

"Why didn't the cheese get sliced? It was destined for grater."

"There once were three holes in the ground... Well, well, well."

"Why did the woman marry the shoe maker? Because she was his sole mate."

"People like it when girls shake their boobs and butts in public, but when I spin my penis in a circle, people call me a ""Sex offender"" and tell me ""Don't do that in public parks."""

"Two ladies fighting for a seat in a bus .. Bus conductor : The older one should sit here Both looked at each other And the seat remained empty :p"

"Me: I want to buy this chicken Farmer: Ok. Gonna take him home and eat him? *imagines self fighting crime with new chicken buddy* Me: Yes"

"A little lizard So a girl walks into a bar with a little lizard and the bartender asks her what she has in her hands. She replies that it's my newt."