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Joke of the Day

"After our house burnt down, the police said it could be someone we know... My wife and I had one question. ""Could it be arson?"""

"It's just a matter of time before they add the word ""Syndrome"" after my last name."

"LPT: Don't eat Taco Bell for breakfast. Or you're gonna have a shitty day."

"What does a deaf woman say to a premature ejaculator? Come again?"

"Yeah, I knew Shakespeare in college. Typical neck bard."

"Q: What's the difference between a moose and an ant? A: A moose has antlers, but an ant doesn't have mooselers."

"Girl on Facebook Heyy i have not seen u since high school. Me. It's been a while. Her. Yea been married 6 years now : ) Me. Unfriend"

"A man goes to visit the doctor Man: Did the test results come back? Doc: Yes, and the prognosis isn't good. Man: Well how long do I have? Doc: About 10. Man: 10 what? Years? Months? Doc: 8... 7...."

"What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The Wheelchair"

"The truth about Unicorn Q: Why do unicorns only let virgin women get close to them? A: Because they are horny."