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Joke of the Day
"If you get a tattoo of a thermos, Is it now a thermostat?"
Next Joke
"Anyone hear the one.. Anyone hear the one about the messy bed? Yeah, I made it up."
"Of all the lies I tell, ""I was just kidding!"" is my favorite."
"What does an envelope say when you lick it? Nothing. It just shuts up."
"A helium atom walks into a bar. The bartender says ""get out, we don't serve your kind here"". The helium atom did not react."
"Did you hear the bad news about the Italian chef? He pasta way."
"When someone tells you that the integers are a more useful set of numbers than the natural numbers, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life."
"I see your limerick... There once was a man from Wheeling Who pounded his pud with great feeling And then like a trout He'd stick his mouth out And wait for the drops from the ceiling"
"Me: Your shoes are on the wrong feet. 4yo: .. Me: .. 4yo: .. Me: .. 4yo: I don't have any other feet.. Me: Fair enough."
"Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list? Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell."