157822

Joke of the Day

"Next time you take your dog for a walk, dress like a cop & pretend to be searching the neighborhood for drugs."

"What would LMFAO's hit song be called if they were Russian? ""I'm Slavic and I know it"""

"Why can't you email a picture to a jedi? Because attachments are forbidden."

"[High school reunion] Classmate: I've been out building schools in Africa Me: I got banned from the zoo for gluing sideburns onto a dolphin"

"Brains are wonderful, I wish everyone had one."

"I've clicked on every shady ad that I've seen for the past 12 years. My penis is now 648 feet long."

"When you wish upon a star Makes no difference who you are It's a ball of gas and fire It can't hear you."

"As I was going to St. Ives I met a man with seven wives And that fucker looked depressed."

"What's the difference between a basketball player and a mexican? Nothing, they both run, jump, shoot and steal."

"I fell off a forty foot ladder today.... lucky I was on the bottom rung."