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Joke of the Day

"I love dicks. I went there the other day, and they have great products and really friendly staff!"

"Thank you Facebook, I can now farm without going outside, cook without being in my kitchen, feed fish I don't have & waste an entire day without having a life."

"The average person has sex 103 times a year and it's almost March so that means only 103 more to go."

"Why do we hire Nazis as Game Developers? Because they're Pro-Grammer."

"What's the difference between an epileptic oyster shucker and a hooker with dysentery? One of them shucks between fits."

"What was the name of the gay World War II themed porn film starring Charlie Chaplin as Adolf Hitler? The Great Dick Taker"

"Bought some sneakers off of a drug dealer... I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin' all day!"

"What do you call four mexicans in quick sand? Quatro, cinco."

"Donald Trump is an inspiration to all new College graduates. He is in the final interview rounds of a job he has zero experience for."

"[first date] HIM: Can I call you sometime? HER: [slowly slides napkin over phone] You can't... I lost my phone"