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Joke of the Day

"Careful...I've already had our entire fight in my head and it doesn't end well for you."

"Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn,..... Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn, I can hear it in the kitchen. Husband: I'm not, it's Sharapova vs Serena."

"Hey dad, i got a question for the sex with my girlfriend Can you stop doing it?"

"I've only got a few more weeks to convince my wife that our baby's middle name should be Underscore."

"Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team? Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole."

"Why does Mel Gibson never order a French Dip at a restaurant? Because it comes with Au Jus."

"A condom doesn't guarantee safe sex. My friend was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband."

"Why did the pig go to the casino? To play the slop machine!"

"Do you know how to avoid click bait? Obviously not..."

"What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean."