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Joke of the Day

"A younger chimp asks one of his elders what's a conditioned reflex. The older chimp says: ""When I press this red button an idiot in a white coat will open that door and bring us some bananas."""

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"I've been watching a bird do a mating dance for half an hour now, it's working, I want him."
"I recently saw a movie about nuts and bolts..... The plot was riveting!"
"Teach a man to fish, and he'll be able to eat for a lifetime Teach a Nigerian to phish, and he'll become a prince."
"I have to mispronounce 'Lincoln' and 'cologne' if I want to spell them correctly."
"What does the highest paid WNBA player make? Sandwiches."
"What's Avagodro's favorite type of dip? GuacaMOLE"
"What color do you think Eddie Smurphy was? Blue, you racists"
"What did the Ocean say to the Beach? Nothing, it just waved... Prolly my favorite joke of all time, maybe ever."
"Lauren on Facebook asks: ""What's the best way to ward off ghosts?"" To which I replied: ""a camera."""