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Joke of the Day

"What do you get if you cross the Internet with a currant bread? Spotted click"

"What's blue, small and sits in a corner? A baby with its hand in the power socket."

"I bought my Nan a stairlift the other day... She said it drives her up the fucking wall."

"If your opponent cracks his knuckles before a fight, have comfort knowing that osteoarthritis will, in due time, avenge your savage beating."

"What do women call men who are shorter than 5'7""? Friends"

"What do you call Benedict Cumberbatch in The Imitation Game? Homogeneous."

"What do fat chicks do in the summer time? Stink."

"It's just a game but... last night Tom Brady was sacked more than milk and bread at the grocery store before a snow day"

"hmmm public speakimg clases..? well do u hav private speakimg clases? bc i hav a secret *leans in close to u* I NEVER LEARNED HOW TO WHISPER"

"Did you ever wonder what happen to the ""Dude you're getting a dell"" guy Apparently he works at target now trying to get people to buy Adele's cd."