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Joke of the Day

"Do you know what's the best thing about necrophilia? You don't have to bring flowers... Usually they're already there."

"Have you heard the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He stayed up all night wondering whether or not there really is a dog."

"I've snapped a bunch of necks Being a necklace photographer isn't too bad"

"Q: How can you identify an Irish pirate? A: He's the one with patches over both eyes."

"Best Buy's MLK Day sale Half off all black speakers, today only"

"Funny one liner: Virgin Pussy is a ""Road not taken"""

"Apparently, ""No kidding!"" isn't a good response when your boss says he's confused."

"Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock? I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!"

"You know who the real winner is today? The guy who sells ""I voted"" stickers."

"I never touch baby carrots because I'm afraid the mother will reject them."