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Joke of the Day

"How many girlfriend does a white boy need to shoot a school? None."

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"How do Ethiopian parents celebrate their child's first birthday? By putting flowers on its grave."
"What do you call a politician that can play brass? Donald trumpet"
"The lottery gives you a 1 in 200 million chance you won't go to work tomorrow. Alcohol gives you 1 in 5. You play your game; I'll play mine."
"How do you make a post man sad? Kill his family."
"What do you call a female peacock? A peacunt!"
"Why did I throw my phone out of my window? Because I turned on airplane mode, and thought it would turn my Iphone into a plane..."
"So I'm here at the wailing wall, like a moron, with my harpoon."
"Today a girl kissed me I wish I could post it in another subreddit Edit: Thanks for gold :D"
"What do you call something brown and sticky? A stick. I'll see myself out."