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Joke of the Day
"Sometimes I wish I were an octopus... so that I could slap 8 people at once."
Next Joke
"What do you call conjoined twins with the same name? Sharron."
"If you surround yourself with people who are full of drama, don't bitch if a shitstorm is always blowing through your life."
"Did you hear about the depressed lactose-intolerant woman? She committed soya-cide."
"""my son, can I ask why you're carrying two HUGE crucifixes?"" Well father, I've been... Double-crossed *God starts breakdancing*"
"I asked Roy Hodgson if he would consider 4-4-2 next week. He said, ""No, we'll probably go 7-4-7 it's wider and offers more leg room."""
"I'd be able to find affordable glasses... In an eye deal world."
"What did Kenny G say when he got off the elevator? - What did Kenny G say when he got off the elevator? - ""Man, this place ROCKS!"" (from Stephen King - The Cell)"
"Dear Algebra, Don't make us find your X. She is never going to come back, And don't ask Y."
"Never eat bear steaks... they're too gristly. (grizzly if you didn't get it)"