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Joke of the Day
"Life is like a box of chocolates... It'll kill your dog."
Next Joke
"Do you know what really bugs me? Discreetly placed microphones."
"I slept through my girlfriend's alarm this morning and hit the ground running after her husband threw me out the window."
"My bank has informed me that Twitter followers can not be used as collateral for a car loan. You guys are useless."
"Watching Jon Stewart Feb. 4th Turd-accino, Jon really? It was right there in front of you!!!"
"What is a blonde's mating call? ''NEXT!''"
"When you die your voice gets added to the Big Bang Theory laugh track."
"Where do galaxies go to college? University! Happy 1st day back to school to many of you :)"
"What is a flea's favourite book ? The itch-hikers guide to the galaxy !"
"A guy wins a contest s] \ A guy wins a contest at home depot Home depot manager:""Alright sir for your prize would you rather have a ladder or 1 million dollars?"" Man:""I'll take the latter."""