154993

Joke of the Day

"What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve."

"If my dick were a card... (x-post from r/hearthstone) ...It'd have overload because you can't take it all at once."

"Thanks Autocorrect, I did want to bang her braids out."

"What do you call an alligator in a vest? Investigator!"

"Just saw a guy wearing sunglasses on the back of his head practicing his golf swing empty-handed. Hope my daughter's a lesbian."

"Why did the arsonist get kicked off the basketball team? He kept getting pyro-technicalities."

"Where do you buy Pikmin from? The Oli-Mart"

"*looks up from phone* Great, I'm inside of a coffin again."

"Every day, my face wakes up 3-4 hours after the rest of me."

"How do you castrate a redneck? You kick his sister in the jaw."