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Joke of the Day
"""Sooth. Sooth! SOOOTH!!!"" --soothsayers"
Next Joke
"Rescue attempts are being made to save a bull stranded on Mt. Everest Reports confirm that the steaks have never been higher."
"Ate a whole box of donuts. But I ate them *really* fast so hopefully that counts as a workout and balances out the calories."
"What is the Free Syrian Army's favourite Western Song I DON'T CARE...ALAWITE I DON'T CARE.."
"WARDEN: You have been sentenced to the Electric Cher ME: in the what now *a metallic voice sings out: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER LOVE*"
"I like my coffee like I like my women... beat up and dragged in a burlap sack over the Andes Mountains."
"You can tell a lot about a person by holding them hostage and asking them questions."
"Did you hear about the suicide bomber that became a Youtube sensation? He never thought he'd blow up like this."
"What does a man keep in his pants that often pokes the hole it's poked before? His keys, you filthy-minded bastard."
"If you're first on a YouTube comment thread, I assume you're last in pretty much everything else."