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Joke of the Day
"If the carpet matches the drapes I'll install the hardwood for free"
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"Instead of a happy ending the masseuse gave me an indie movie ending. She stopped suddenly at a random point and left everything unresolved."
"How do you get gum out of hair? cancer -I'm sorry-"
"Why do Apple computer users always tell sexist jokes? Because they aren't PC"
"What sounds like a robot and bumps into tables? Stephen Hawking."
"How I fall asleep People get jealous of me because of how fast I fall asleep so I'm going to share my secret. First of all, ally you have to do is close your ey..."
"yo momma so stupid when her gas ran out, she sold her car to pay for her petrol."
"In politics we call it left-wing and right-wing because we are all a part of the same bird. And we are all being told what to do by bird brains."
"Why do strippers hate roofers? They always pay in shingles."
"I just started the tequila diet and I'm making great progress! I've already lost 2 days!"