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Joke of the Day

"Just saw that my wife was googling ballroom dancing lessons and now I'm hoping that she's having an affair."

"Why was the clown kicked out of the maths lesson? Because he kept throwing his pi in other peoples faces!"

"Me: oil change plz Toyota: it'll be $39 Me: cool heres my $2 off coupon 4 hrs later T: ur steering wheel fell off total is $2900 sign here"

"When the devil loses hair There will be hell toupee"

"What's 50 Cents name in Zimbabwe? 400 million."

"I thought the big NYC ball was mechanically operated but I guess not. I heard Mariah Carey dropped it last night during her performance."

"What Supreme Court decision applies to fishermen bringing a small boat to shore? Row v. Wade"

"We've hired a new accountant. Her name is Helen Wait. Anyone expecting a check from us can go to Helen Wait."

"What did the priest say at the salad bar? Lettuce pray."

"How many lives does a German cat have NEIN!"