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Joke of the Day
"I love getting Halloween candy... It makes me Snicker(s)."
Next Joke
"What has seven arms and can't spell? Def Leppard"
"What did the hookers hang on the christmas tree? Whore-naments"
"Give a retarded man a fish... And he'll plant it and try to grow a fish tree."
"[hears a voice in the sky] - Is it you? GOD?! [kneels] Voice: Could the idiot on platform 4 stop kneeling every time I make an announcement?"
"Me: I want to buy this chicken Farmer: Ok. Gonna take him home and eat him? *imagines self fighting crime with new chicken buddy* Me: Yes"
"A farmer in Devon has made history by growing a field of dildos! Unfortunately she's had a lot of problems with squatters."
"What's the hardest part of a gardener's job? Getting to the root of the problem."
"I was told to bring a box of tissues with me when my friends and I watched Bambi. You can imagine my disappointment."
"If you've seen me impatiently standing in line, then you've seen me dancing at a concert."