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Joke of the Day

"What animal has exactly 12 grams of carbon? A mole"

"Don't have a ""Garage sale"" if I can't buy your garage idiot."

"If you watch Intervention backwards, it's about a person partying hard after an awful family reunion."

"[gym] Trainer: You here to get cut? Me: Uhh no, I'm already circumcised and if that's covered under my membership, I want a reduced bill"

"What does a man often wake with, but can never go to sleep with? An alarm, you pervert!"

"Watching Mickey's Clubhouse with my 4yo and even he's asking why the hell would a duck like Donald need a life jacket."

"Not being able to read because your book ran out of batteries is a pretty hilarious first-world problem."

"What do you say when you leave the UAE? Dubai-bye!"

"Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was a salted."

"6:30 is the best time on a clock... ...hands down."