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Joke of the Day
"What do vegetarian worms eat?? Linda Mcartney"
Next Joke
"If you punched a random Brit today... There would be a 52% chance they deserved it."
"If you love Christmas so much... *Why don't you merry it?*"
"Women should not have children after 35. Really ... 35 children are enough."
"I painted the garage with my girlfriend yesterday Now I can't get the paint out of her hair."
"Sweet dreams are made of cheese. Who am I to diss a brie. I cheddar the world and the feta cheese."
"Why was the ghost on an episode of Hoaders? He was a little... Possesive"
"A buddy gave me some of his pee in a jar so I could pass a drug screen. I failed, which is weird, cause I drank ALL of it."
"*runs into the back of wife's leg with the grocery cart for the 5th time* me: We meet agai- wife: Go wait in the car me: Ok"
"If you ever see me wearing anything fur lined or faux fur, please punch the person I'm with in the face. I've been kidnapped & need saved!!"