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Joke of the Day
"The date was going really well until he told me to stop calling it Pasghetti."
Next Joke
"Why is life like a penis? Because Women make it hard!"
"What song do isis members play during executions Burn baby burn"
"What do you say when someone dies while getting an erection? He came and went at the same time."
"Just received an email saying: ""Want to see Celine Dion live?"" My first thought was that it was a ransom demand."
"Once I've repeated what I said for the third time, I have to tell my dark family secret: I come from a long line of mumblers."
"So I was driving home from work tonight, I saw a woman texting whilst driving. It infuriated me so much I threw my beer bottle at her car."
"[slides briefcase of money across the counter] ""two big macs please"" [opens briefcase to reveal $7]"
"Me: [opens front facing camera at a funeral and starts crying] ""he must've meant a lot to her."""
"You would think that you would be a better pastry chef With all the creampie videos I watch..."