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Joke of the Day

"I'm really good at managing my credit card... ...My bank keeps sending me letters saying my account is outstanding."

"Cowboy . . . and no vet How did the cowboy know his pony was getting sick? He was a little hoarse."

"Child twister: ""I can't tear up that farmhouse, Dad"" Dad twister: ""Come on son we're Kansas tornadoes, not Kan'tsas tornadoesn'ts"""

"What is mother-approved and child-tested? Coat-Hanger Abortions"

"BREAKING NEWS: Due to the horrible conditions at Sochi, the Olympics have been moved to a much safer place.. Chernobyl."

"Betsy the cow applied to leather crafting college early decision. Unfortunately she was defurred."

"Why did the vulture cross the road? To eat the dead chicken on the other side."

"North America Sodium, atomic number 11, was first isolated by Humphry Davy in 1807. A chemical component of salt, he named it Na in honor of the saltiest region on earth, North America."

"Please don't post a screenshot if your battery percentage is low, I can't focus on the picture because your low battery is stressing me out."

"Some guy yesterday wanted to get all up in my grill... ... So I hit him with my truck."