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Joke of the Day

"What's big, green, fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table."

"What do you call someone who cleans vacuums? A vacuum cleaner."

"Everyone wants to see fifty shades of grey Being colorblind fucking sucks!"

"What's a pirates favorite letter? Them: R You: No, its the C!!!!"

"What do you call a car accident between two Nissan pick-up trucks? Crash of the Titans"

"I totally understand how batteries feel. Because I'm rarely ever included in things either."

"What do you call a bad riddle? Voldemort"

"YO mama is so poor... She can't even pay attention"

"My girlfriend was crying after she had a miscarriage... I said, ""don't worry hunny, at least it was still born..."""

"Woke up on the wrong side of the bed today By the time I got out from under there I was in a right mood!"