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Joke of the Day

"We're gonna break the Twitter on Mother's Day with Your Mom jokes, aren't we?"

"A horse walks into a bar... A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says ""Why the long face?"" The horse says ""I have AIDS."""

"I'm not trying to be mean, but... I'm pretty average."

"Q: What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor? A: About 10 pounds."

"She left me a note, on the fridge... ""It's not working anymore, I'm leaving you"". I opened up the fridge and it is working. She left me for nothing, that idiot."

"I thought you were trying to get into shape? I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle."

"So after the subreddit banning went down, I texted Ellen Pao asking if this was some sort of a joke. She responded ""Im SRS"""

"""Last Airbender"" got a 6% on 'Rotten Tomatoes.' Do you know how bad a film has to be to get below 15%? ""2 Girls 1 Cup"" got an 18%."

"Did you find my horse well behaved? Indeed whenever we came to a fence he let me over first!"

"Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me. Everyone I told swore they wouldn't tell anyone else."