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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Chinese man with a lot of cats and dogs? A pet shop owner you racist scum!"

"I entered what I ate for lunch into my calorie counting app and it uninstalled itself."

"The downside of DVR is getting freaked out by tornado warnings from four days ago"

"What's the difference between an epileptic corn husker and a nymphomaniac with diarrhea? One shucks between fits"

"A 900 kilogram pumpkin fell on a local man today. Reports say he was squashed."

"Did you here about the girl who got electrocuted by her vibrator at a sleep over? It was such a buzz kill"

"We all hold our hand out for help in this life. The goal should be to have your palm down more often than up."

"What's the difference between a Bernie Sanders supporter and a fat stripper? A fat stripper actually gets to the polls."

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill."

"Ask me if I'm a truck."