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Joke of the Day
"God loves me even when I don't forward those chain letters"
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"I used to work at the factory that made fire hydrants. Couldn't park anywhere near the place."
"What gas do snails prefer? Shell."
"There are few things in life as pure and true as a grilled cheese sandwich."
"I used to be a werewolf... but I'm alright noooooooowwwwww!"
"Where does David Cameron keep his hidden money? In the Piggy bank"
"A guy walks into a bar... *clang!*... he says ""ouch"" and ducks next time."
"It looks like I'm missing a lot of tweets. They were probably so great the Library of Congress just couldn't wait to archive them."
"This table is a bit wobbly, one of the legs appears to be shorter, Luckily I have just been given a copy of the new album by Nickleback"
"What kind of luggage does a vulture bring on a plane? Carrion."