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Joke of the Day

"Little girls and fish Why do little girls put fishes down their pants? So the can smell like big girls!"

"Old people at weddings poke me and say ""Your next"". So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals."

"So a horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Why the long face?"" The horse responds, ""They wouldn't renew Sex and the City for another season."""

"Cinderella Joke What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? UGHACKLURB (Gagging noise)"

"This lady on the train has that raspy, cigarette, alcohol, at death's door kinda voice. I'ma see if she'll record my voice mail message."

"Eagles QB Michael Vick is engaged to be married. But both Rappers Pitbull and Snoop Dogg declined the invitation."

"Is that sick enough for you?! I man calls in sick to work. His boss thinks he sounds fine so he says, ""You don't sound sick."" Man, ""IM FUCKING MY SISTER! IS THAT SICK ENOUGH FOR YOU!?"""

"Wanna hear a funny joke? Womens rights."

"MATH PROBLEM: If you give half of your apple to a friend, what do you have? ME (through tears): A...a friend"

"My sex life is like flipping a coin. I'm not getting head whenever I chase tail."