14963

Joke of the Day

"What do a flat-earther, a Nazi, and YOU have in common? They all get one vote."

"Cop: ""Did you kill this man?"" Me: ""No, a bullet killed him. Bullets are made of lead, which comes from the ground. The ground is part of nature. He died of natural causes. Case closed."""

"5,""So we don't get to open any presents today?"" Me, ""No."" 5, ""So basically Thanksgiving is just Christmas for your tummy, right?"""

"I had to return those books on Middle Eastern agricultural products. They were past the Dubai dates."

"What do Welshmen call a sheep dog in Wales? Their Pimp"

"Christianity jokes Q: What did Jesus say while he was getting crucified? A: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! (feel free to share yours)"

"Why did the light turn red? You would too if you were caught changing in the middle of the street!"

"I think the worst part about making your own porn movie is . . . . . .when the couple hear you in the cupboard"

"Why did the hippy teach the lumberjack calculus? So he'd use natural logs!"

"I started a book club. A coloring book club. There's a line to get in. We're never on the same page. Nothing's black & white. We're well red"