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Joke of the Day

"Peanut Butter Joke Do you pee nut butter?"

"a Guy walks down an American street. He sees a policeman and wave. Later the same day the police explain to the press: ''It was self-defence, he had a gun in his hand somewhere''"

"Did you know that 82% of women have used vibrators? The other 18% have new ones..."

"Right off the bat Cinderella knows she's marrying a prince with a serious foot fetish."

"Dictators dress to oppress."

"Restless leg syndrome does not give you the right to swiftly kick people whenever you feel like it. I know that now.. "

"I started a band with my dog. He barks while I eat Cheetos. It's indie, you wouldn't get it."

"I saw a guy in a Prius run out of gas... instead of giving him a ride,, I sent him positive energy & world peace cause that means more to him"

"When I die, please bury me wrapped in a sheet. That way I won't have to look for one when I become a ghost"

"Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by putting it in water? If it sinks, it's a girl. If it floats, it's buoyant"