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Joke of the Day

"Cation Pronunciation : [kat-ahy-uhn,-on] -Noun Chemistry 1.An ion with paws-tive charge. 2.The cutest ion ever."

"""Hi yes I'd like to attempt the Cheeseburger challenge"" ""Very good sir"" [ripped as hell cheeseburger runs out of the kitchen & bodyslams me]"

"Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common? A: They've both swallowed a lot of semen."

"Why didn't Jesus have any children? He only got nailed by guys ;)"

"The cops came to my door to give me a ticket for a dog at large. They say he was chasing a kid on a bike. I said, ""that's not true, my dog can't ride a bike."""

"If Adam had been gay We would have all been fucked, except Eve"

"""This team looks good,"" said my son of the somewhat browner soccer team who were not yet playing soccer. #racist"

"[Sci fi movie] How did you travel such a distance so fast? ""I went through a wormhole."" Worms in the audience: Omg this is so unrealistic."

"I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching To reverse and leaving the scene"

"Oh I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood. This is a Ferrets wheel. When your compartment is 90 feet in the air, we release the ferrets."