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Joke of the Day

"First Olympic sailing result just in. GB have taken gold, Australia have taken silver and Somalia have taken the boat"

"Why did the snail drink beer? To come out of its shell!"

"What's a pilots least favorite holiday? May Day!"

"My girlfriend dumped me for talking too much about video games what a ridiculous thing to fallout 4"

"What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4."

"I was sexually assaulted by tony the tiger today. I'm pushing charges for rrrrrrape."

"Goals for my kids before I had them: teach them Spanish, only use positive reinforcement, never yell. After: get them to put on pants."

"Scientists have discovered secret of infinite electric pover... ... - a generator without 'Turn off' button."

"What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas? Forty feet of track - all straight!"

"How do you have a sexy barbecue? You grill the sausage."