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Joke of the Day

"The British are coming! The British are coming! The British have to get up early! The British swear they'll call you in the morning!"

Next Joke
 
"My wife tells me my conspiracy theory obsession is getting out of control.. I wonder how much the government paid her to say that."
"I was tired yesterday and now I'm tired again today I'm retired"
"What goes ""Clip""? A one legged horse!"
"A guy caught cold. His wife offers to make him Chicken Soup A chicken sitting nearby says ""Why don't you try Aleve first, ma'am?"""
"there has been a shooting at the Westboro Baptist church... police report 3 dozen cheerful bystanders, yet nobody claims to have seen who did it."
"Why are smaller breasts better for breastfeeding? They're more of a kids meal."
"What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink? Serving dual porpoises!"
"Why did the sushi cross the road? Sushi could get to the other side."
"I get my exercise by running and jumping over the light beam before my garage door closes on me."
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