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Joke of the Day

"So excited! I'm taking an online grammar class. No more typos for me. Nolege is power biches!"

"What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation mark? The period: it marks the end of his sentence."

"i hate that one occasional cadbury cream egg you get that has a bloody malformed cadbury bunny fetus inside"

"I met a girl in the pub last night and we ended up back at my place. I didn't have a f*cking clue what I was getting myself into. So I politely asked her to shave it."

"What's the difference between talking to your wife after you forgot something and a minefield? You can actually get through the minefield alive."

"A quadriplegic goes on a blind date... And he gets stood up."

"The vast majority of spider couples met on the web."

"A panic attack is hearing your teens laughing in another room at the same time you can't find your phone."

"Told my doctor I wanted him to check my prostate without lube He put both his hands on my shoulders and went to town"

"She was upset when I gave her 4 quarters rather than dollar... It has the same value. It doesn't make any cents."