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Joke of the Day

"Caeser ran into his friends Brutus Brutus said ""hey Julius, I heard you raped a Senators wife. What happened?"". Caeser replied. "" Vidi Vici Veni!"""

"What do you call a former CIA agent when a winter storm hits? Snowed-in"

"If countries don't want revolutions, they should stop putting large public squares in the middle of their cities. So stupid!"

"Not enough drugs in the world that would make me strip in front of a webcam. But a bottle of wine should do it."

"DID YOU KNOW: The average Apple worker works 16 hours longer than the average Apple battery."

"Pretty weird to think that in the future, there will be old people named 'Hailey' and 'Brayden' running around in vintage Twilight t-shirts."

"My wife has just come home and asked how things went with the baby. Now in mild panic mode as I thought she took the baby along with her"

"Curling irons have a warning tag that says ""For External Use Only."" Which of you sick fucks made that necessary?"

"[Dirty Joke] A pig fell in mud. An even dirtier joke: Two pigs fell in mud."

"They say seeing is believing, I never saw 9/11 happen. Therefore, 9/11 NEVER HAPPENED. Yes bad logic but hey, it's a quick laugh."