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Joke of the Day

"Say what you want about kleptomaniacs, but they're definitely not cowards. Those guys have got balls of steal."

"My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab."

"What gets larger every time I see my Girlfriend? My credit card bill."

"What do you call the rough parts of Paris? La Ba-ghetto"

"*Sees girl trying to reach soup on top shelf* ""Here let me get that"" I say [Beacuse I'm much taller] *I put the soup in my cart & walk away*"

"I get why Tupac's band smoked his ashes... ...It would have been tacky to take a shot in his memory."

"Why is a dance like a bowl of cereal? They are both more enjoyable with dates!"

"To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Chuck Norris."

"Want to hear the one about potassium? K."

"What did one John say to the other John? ""What's the matter? You look flushed!"""