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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a hippy chick and a hockey chick? A hockey chick showers every 3 periods."

"Ate shrooms & I feel nothing. Just an awful taste in my mouth. Also the dealer overcharged me. Also he's a centaur with spiders for lips"

"I invited Alan over for dinner. ""Alan Jacobs? Or Alan who thinks he's Captain America?"" *a badly painted bin lid smashes through the window*"

"Pickup line! NSFW Did you watch the news report on how sausage can give you cancer? Well I know where you can find one which won't give you cancer ;)"

"Why do they call it a chicken coupe? If it had 4 doors it'd be a chicken sedan."

"If I could have back all the money I've spent on drugs and alcohol, I'd celebrate by buying more drugs and alcohol."

"""Gotham deserves a relaxed hero that smells of lavender."" - Bathman"

"Somehow my beach-bod went to a dad-bod and unfortunately now it's more of a beached-dad-bod."

"If all the good ones are taken and you are single, what does that make you?"

"You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes Literally"