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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a pair of stubborn testicles? A refuse sack."

"My girlfriend called me a pedophile Which is a pretty big word for a 9 year old"

"4-year-old: What's that? Me: A vegetable you won't like. If you don't tell Mom, I'll take it from you. *eats her bacon*"

"""Treat Others the Way You Want to be Treated"" *Buys everyone snacks"

"10 years ago, my teenage daughter ran away from home. I bumped into her the other day and she said ""Dad, I have something to tell you. I'm a prostitute"". I always knew she would suck seed."

"Did you hear about the lady who walked backwards into an airplane propeller? Disassedher"

"Taking the Drivers test made me realize I wanted to be a race car driver..... ......the instructor was surprised at how fast I was driving."

"I've just found a Christmas present for my daughter in the loft. I'll take it up to her later."

"God said onto the sodomites ""go fuck yourselves"" And so they did"

"75% of my day consists of looking at the clock and not believing it"