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Joke of the Day

"If I had a dollar for every time I fell for a tweeter instead of a real person, I could pay for the psychiatric help I obviously need."

"There's a 100% chance the Republicans will discuss Starbucks cups in a debate tonight, so remember that when they ask how they lost in 2016."

"FREEKY BLONDE Blonde1- Hey can I have some of your shampoo? Blonde2- Yeah, why not use yours? Blonde1- Mine is for dry hair and I got it wet already"

"Corn Give a white man an ear of corn, he eats for a day Teach a white man to grow corn, he steals all your land"

"I should buy a 26.2 sticker! for my nose..."

"Heard this one from my little brother. Poor Timmy... Him: Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Me: why? Him: Timmy has no arms. Knock knock. Me: Who's there? Him: Not Timmy."

"I would like to think money won't change me, but I won $5 on a scratch-off lottery ticket and immediately bought name brand aluminum foil."

"Trying to argue with someone over text is like being Italian and trying to talk with handcuffs on"

"What did Obama say when he proposed to Michelle? ""I don't wanna be o-ba-ma self."" _________ (Not original)"

"Don't try to understand women. Women understand women, that's why they hate each other."