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Joke of the Day

"""You never told me you were vegan!"" - no one ever"

"What did 0 say to 8 ? Nice belt!"

"Police have finally admitted they got it wrong in the shooting of Jean Charles de Menez. It was his naughty brother Dennis they were after."

"Just heard a little kid tell his dad he was a lion and his dad said ""Wow!"" What a fucking pair of idiots."

"Why did the Oregon State psychology major climb up the chain link fence? To see what was on the other side."

"I'm going to a notable restaurant tonight. I'm excited, but I don't know where I'll put my plate."

"Got run over by a limo today Took fucking ages"

"Why don't deaf guys eat pusseh? They never heard of it."

"Have you ever hit a man with glasses? No. A 2by4 works much better."

"Foreigners suck... They blatantly disregard the ""i before e except after c"" rule."